I’m going to have TWO lives! :)

Will someone just stop the time from running so things may just stay where they perfectly are? Will someone just hit that freeze button so I can enjoy what is around me for a little longer? I just want a time out. I just want to get away from all these rushing changes…

Four years ago, I looked at the mirror and told myself, “Wow, I’m in high school!” I was so excited to experience what it was like. I was very eager to know if Sharon Cuneta’s song “High School Life” is really true, if it’s that exciting, beautiful and worth remembering. And guess what, the song’s lyrics are all facts. Now, I faced that same mirror again and this time, I told myself, “Wow, I’m going off to college!” Yes, I still felt that same feeling of thrill to enter a new world. But another feeling overruled that excitement, and that feeling is fear.

I mean, college is huge and scary… super scary. There are lots of what ifs going around my mind. “What if I’ll fail? What if I’ll be rejected? What if I don’t fit it?” – Yep, I’m talking about these kinds of nonsensical what ifs. But what I’m really afraid of is that I’m going to leave my life. You read that right, I’m going to leave the life that I’ve always wanted, the life filled with wonderful people and with love, love, love! You can’t just take that fear away from me, I grew up in this rural yet perfect city you know. I spent my sixteen years here in Bislig City. And those sixteen years were WOW!

I would want to make that life longer; I would want that life to be eternal. But I know life, as always, brings changes. It’s a norm! And I also know those changes are wonderful. As I get in the car tomorrow, I’m going to sit in the window side. So when I look back I’ll see those wonderful people who love me so much and made my life brilliant. And when I reach Dumaguete, I’m going to be alive again! I’m going to start a new life, my college life. But that doesn’t mean I’m throwing the world I have and the life I made in Bislig, no. That will never happen. Because I’ll always have that life in my heart and I will always hope that as I return home, that same life would still be there, waiting for me to re-live it.#